YESTERDAY WAS A TYPICAL DAY

Justin Rands

I was lying in a puddle of black paint.

Behind my neighbors barn next to some haystacks.

Staring at the back of a magazine.

With a naked woman pointing to a brain and telling me to grow.

I felt foolish and kissed her face.

I put down the magazine and jumped against the wall of the barn.

The marks of my body dripped down and over the red paint.

One of the cows mooed so I picked up a pig and went into the house.

I walked into my room and looked up 'how to paint a pig eating a woman.'

There weren't any direct links so I clicked on Image Results.

The second image I saw was a woman eating a pig in a restaurant.

I decided that I liked it better so I grabbed my X-Acto knife and cut into the screen.

Neon orange liquid began to drip out immediately

I licked my lips.

The pig started squealing when I did that.

I petted him on the head and told him to fuck off.

I cut a rectangle around the image on the screen.

My hands were orange.

My head was light.

I began to peel off the image on the screen but smoke began to billow out of the small hole I had created.

I peeled the whole image off and through the screen towards the pig.

He ate it viciously.

I had a hole in my screen so I put my hand through it.

I felt another hand on the other side.

It grabbed mine and we shook.

I felt self conscious about my hand shake for a moment.

Then I pulled my hand out of the screen and looked at it.

It was orange and there were numbers written on my palm.

1011011101110110101.

I thought the black text against my neon orange hand looked aesthetically pleasing.

I thought, "That's artsy".

I grabbed my camera and took a picture of my hand.

I pressed the button that looked like a 'play' button and waited for the image to load.

When it appeared the image wasn't my hand.

The image was of the room I was in shot from the angle of the top of the ceiling.

I wasn't in the image.

The pig was in the middle of the room on the gray carpet my grandmother knit me.

The windows were on the floor and one was open.

I felt worried that something had happened to my reality.

So I turned the camera off.

When I turned it back on the screen was different.

There was a picture of two girls with a lot of make up on.

The camera was really close to their faces.

I couldn't tell where they were.

One of the girl's eyes were half closed and her cheeks were really big.

The other girl had something in her teeth.

I turned off my camera again.

"Oh shit," I said.

There was a hand sticking out of the hole in my computer screen.

The index finger was motioning me to come close.

I moved closer and looked at the hand.

It had red fingernails and a bracelet around it.

I grabbed the hand.

The hand pulled hard and I found myself floating.

Everything was dark.

Then bright.

Then gray.

Then dark again.

Then small flashes of light started to occur.

It felt like I was floating in the dark with a strobe light.

Led Zeppelin started playing.

It started soft.

Then got louder.

And louder.

And louder.

Until my eardrums popped.

It sounded like someone had thrown glass against my heart.

Then nothing.

I opened my eyes and found myself sitting in a restaurant.

My hands were in my pocket.

My hearing was fine.

I looked at legs underneath the table.

Then I looked up and saw the woman eating a pig.

There was a dead pig on her plate.

It looked alive but its eyes were closed.

The woman used her fork and knife and cute small incisions into its flesh.

Her fingernails were red.

Her mouth was a dark cave filled with meat.

Blood dripped from her bottom lip and down her chin.

She smiled and me.

I smirked and asked for a bite.

The pig opened its eyes and squealed.

Justin Rands works at Copy Station in the Financial District of San Francisco and lives an an 130 year old house in the Western Addition. His work has appeared in Pineapple War, Robot Lemon, 3 AM Magazine, Dogmatika , and Freestyle Vision . His band name is Quinoa and he blogs here.
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